Too slow, too slow, too slow,
Buffers in this patchy stream from byte to byte,
To the last bar of complimentary WiFi,
Our browsing has lit noobs the way to blue screens of death.
Update my status,
Life is but a shadow,
a player unknown, that trolls and spams his posts amongst the feed,
until he is perma banned.
It is a rainbow cat gif spewed by a meme-cast,
full of soundboards and malware.